Welcome to the All-New SCREW... Again.
For years, the covers of SCREW carried a line that wasn’t modest, wasn’t polite, and also wasn’t wrong:
First & Best in the Field We Created.
That was true when Al Goldstein dragged the dirty magazine out of the brown paper bag and turned it into a weapon, a joke, a lawsuit, a public nuisance, and a newspaper. And it’s true again now, because no other publication, and certainly no other adult publication, is doing what we’re doing right here, right now.
This is not the old print magazine.
And it's not another boring blog where stories go to die in a pile of links nobody clicks on.
This is SCREW rebuilt for how people actually read now, in 2026: with one hand down their pants, the other on their phone, and about seven seconds of patience.
Swipe left. Swipe right. Swipe up. Read the story. Watch the video. Open the ad. Keep moving.
It’s like Tinder for people who can't swipe a date.
It's like Hot-or-Not, only it's Hot and you're NOT getting any, but at least you can jack off to pictures of it.
And that, my friends, is progress.
This new "tabloid-digital" (coined it!) version of SCREW gives you the best of all worlds. It has the feel of a real magazine issue, with a cover, pages, ads, features, reviews, jokes, rants, interviews, videos, and surprises. But it moves like your phone was built for it ...because it was.
You don’t have to dig around. You don’t have to search. You don’t have to wander through some sad archive like that homeless guy in the dumpster behind our office.
You just swipe through the filth just as God, Al Goldstein, and that horny little gash-goblin inside your brain intended.
And here’s the important part: every issue is its own issue. Not just random posts floating around the internet like cigarette butts in the flooded springtime gutters of Jersey City. Each one stands alone. Each one can be saved, archived, linked, shared, collected, quoted, hated, loved, screenshotted, misunderstood, and blamed in court later.
That matters.
Because magazines used to have shape. They had a front door, a back door, a centerfold, a rhythm, a personality, and a smell. The internet turned all of that into a feed: frictionless, formless, endless, and forgettable. We’re putting the issue back together, page by page, joke by joke, ad by ad, and then handing the whole filthy machine a switchblade and a smartphone.
To paraphrase those Heaven’s Gate weirdos, this is the evolutionary level above print. Only instead of matching sneakers and a comet spaceship, we’ve got free speech, dirty jokes, filthy videos, sexy ads, and a magazine that refuses to lie down quietly.
SCREW started on paper. Now it lives in your hand.
Same attitude.
New machine.
Still first.
Still best.
Start swiping.
Stay Horny,
Phil Italiano
Publisher, SCREW
phil@screw.wtf
